I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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