Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
