maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
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If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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