I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Actions speak louder than pants.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
