I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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