I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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