well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
You're earring is so big in my mouth
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize