Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
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