"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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