lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize