get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
