if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
My brain says no but my pants say off.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
