its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
