Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
