i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
