these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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