have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
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I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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