I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
