Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize