Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
