That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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