just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize