I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
