Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know

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  (603): Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels (1-603) Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know http://tfl.nu/7nn4
  Replies (33) Good night (3222) Bad night (911)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.

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  (901): Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy. http://tfl.nu/fpgv
  Replies (16) Good night (3576) Bad night (744)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i cant lie to you.

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  (336): haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal? (919): i cant lie to you. http://tfl.nu/vpro
  Replies (56) Good night (923) Bad night (3081)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.

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  (972): Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy. http://tfl.nu/2xr2
  Replies (52) Good night (1096) Bad night (9767)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.

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  (305): If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls. http://tfl.nu/m95d
  Replies (8) Good night (5870) Bad night (1218)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them

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  (201): My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them http://tfl.nu/2uni
  Replies (41) Good night (15060) Bad night (1343)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.

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  (903): I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again. http://tfl.nu/pun6
  Replies (39) Good night (4484) Bad night (1047)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.

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  (309): This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend. http://tfl.nu/skkm
  Replies (9) Good night (1863) Bad night (628)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?

  (718): View more from New York

  See you tonight.

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  (201): Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning? (718): See you tonight. http://tfl.nu/wje2
  Replies (4) Good night (1701) Bad night (663)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.

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  (563): smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never. http://tfl.nu/qbl5
  Replies (6) Good night (483) Bad night (747)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS

  (740): View more from Ohio

  BECAUSE SCIENCE

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  (440): WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS (740): BECAUSE SCIENCE http://tfl.nu/5ndo
  Replies (9) Good night (1620) Bad night (514)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.

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  (281): Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician. http://tfl.nu/l4gb
  Replies (4) Good night (1062) Bad night (387)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.

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  (609): I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack. http://tfl.nu/ai2z
  Replies (1) Good night (1443) Bad night (417)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.

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  (314): I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said. http://tfl.nu/hdx1
  Replies (2) Good night (315) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved

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  (315): There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved http://tfl.nu/5bwp
  Replies (1) Good night (457) Bad night (116)

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