I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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