Fine. I'll sleep in my office
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
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We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
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I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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