I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me