The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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