I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
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