I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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