Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
