I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Randomize
