Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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