Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
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