My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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