I'm going to jail i love you
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
