I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
