batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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