fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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