and next time when you feel me up, do it right
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
This is my gift to your gina
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
