The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
