He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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