Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
