The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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