i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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