Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
