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Jerry, you need to find god
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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