you would pick up someone in the library
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize