Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
