I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
