Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize