My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I can text with my tongue
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize